Tuples and Attributes

I admit, the last few years of seemingly unrelenting bad news and of being housebound has gotten to me. I’ve always been a fairly optimistic person, but events this year had basically caused me to throw my hands up in the air and declaim despair for mankind’s, and more specifically, womankind’s, future.

Last year I saw an article about Steve Martin’s then upcoming show “Only Murders in the Building”. When I watched it, I noticed that the two lead, male actors (Steve Martin and Martin Short) were also executive producers. They were joined by a third person, Selena Gomez, in both acting and producing roles. The second season just ended, and I understand there are plans for a third.

I knew I had heard Selena’s name in connection with music and was curious enough to look her up on the internet. Turns out she has been acting since 14 or so and singing about as long. I pulled up one of her albums, “Rare”, on Amazon Prime and was astonished by how good the lyrics were (I enjoyed the music, too).

Then I noticed over on HBO that she had a cooking show that she started during the pandemic. It has her working remotely with well-known chefs who are teaching her how to cook in her home kitchen. That’s now on its 4th season and is a lot of fun to watch.

The woman has somehow successfully navigated childhood stardom, famous boyfriends, lupus, a kidney transplant, and bipolar disorder without becoming a self-centered diva. The cooking show donates to the celebrity chef’s favorite charity. She set up a cosmetic company that focuses on making people feel better about themselves. She has a site, Wondermind, supporting mental health.

It’s not that she’s managed to do all these things by 30 years of age that has brightened my outlook for the future; it’s that a 30-year-old woman can do them at all. When I get down about lack of progress for women and what seems like an actual turning back of the clock, I remember what it was actually like for me at that age, some 40 years ago.

At 27, I was teaching in a parochial high school. When I started teaching a year or two earlier, it was the first year the church had to pay a woman teacher the same as a man. After all, the man, even if single, might someday have to support a family, while the woman, even if single, would have a man to support her.

At that same age of 27, although I had been employed for two or three years as a teacher, I was turned down, with one exception, for every credit card I applied for. No reason given, but as a woman, I would have needed a cosigner on the account. Bank of America was the only bank that looked at my salary and history instead of my sex.

At 28, I joined the Navy. Although all the military branches were ostensibly allowing women to join by then, careers were very limited. The Navy was putting very few women officers on board ships. And throughout my time in service, the Naval Investigative Service was on constant lookout for those “lesbians” that they were sure had infiltrated the ranks and were discharging any they thought they had found.

Then I look at Selena’s career. This is a woman who probably would have been written off as a bit of fluff 30 years ago. My cause for optimism, then? That she is a young, pretty, woman who is taken seriously and gets to make an impact on her own terms. Maybe there is hope for us all yet!